The 'Yes' to Sex App

[asurfaholic]

Meh. Sex is boring to me. Give me a weekend alone with my fishing poles and boat and ....

 

[Suzanimal]

You were the one who said "kinky sex life" as if that was the definition of goodness in marriage.

No I didn't.

FWIW, I kind of agree with him. Women can be independent all they want, but I would rather my wife was submissive because, well, it's just the natural order of things. The men are the protectors and the providers. The women have children and manage the household.

I don't think there's anything sexist about that.

I didn't say there was. I said...

I think it depends on the people and the situation but I see what you're saying.

Would you rather be an expendable male who has to do the hard work and face danger for the sake of his wife and kids? It's just a natural fact that men, being stronger and more physically equipped, do these things and the women, being the ones who can bear children, do what they do to take care of the children and keep their man happy enough to face the challenges he faces every day for her sake.

I'm not saying everyone should do that. By all means, be a strong, independent woman and do the hard jobs, but I think you'll find you're not really marriage material if that's the case. If you do find a man who can deal with that, good for you. I just don't want my marriage to be like that and I think it will make things harder in your life down the road (perhaps not specifically you, but you get the gist).

LOL, I've never claimed to be a "strong, independent, woman". If it weren't for Mr Animal, I'd probably be homeless and he'd probably be rich and skinny.

 

[asurfaholic]

 

[FloralScent]

Meh it says she has to have her limbs moved. I don't want a cripple robot girlfriend.

Just pretend it's some chick you slipped a roofie.

 

[PaulConventionWV]

It's human nature, much like it is human nature how most people hate freedom.

People didn't live very long up until 100 years ago or so, therefore being married until death do you part, was more likely than not.

Now, stick two people together for 20-30-40 years or more, and before long, they begin to loathe the very sight, smell and voice of the other person.

The sad part is, that loathing is usually one sided, one or the other will still look at their partner, who despises them, with love and affection and desire.

I understand, but I really think it has to do with how a person changes over time. For instance, my dad was probably a pretty cool guy when he was young and married my mom in Illinois, but when they moved to WV together and had 6 kids, my dad became kind of a hick and lost some of his teeth and generally doesn't seem to have anything in the way of social skills anymore, which he may have had decades ago when he was young. My mom, on the other hand, doesn't seem to have changed much, at least from what I can tell about how she was when she was young.

On the other hand, my mom's parents have been married for 65 years and still seem to love each other very much.

To be honest, I don't think it's just human nature. It usually has something to do with the way a person changes over time and stops trying to please their spouse any way they can, which is really what marriage is about. If you love each other, then you should want to do everything you can to make each other happy, and letting yourself go to waste is usually going to get in the way of that even if the other person doesn't say anything out of love. My mom divorced my dad after 20 years and 6 kids and despite disagreeing, I actually noticed that my mom and the children still living with her became much happier as a result. If you marry a person, you should take note of what they find attractive about you and try to maintain the desire to please them in those ways.

 

[PaulConventionWV]

Just like some slaver owners actually treated their slaves well

Again, there's a big difference...

Being dominant is not necessarily treating someone like a slave.

 

[PaulConventionWV]

The type of women that are overly submissive are the ones that will cheat on you because they don't know how to say no. And I'd rather spend my time with an intellectual equal than some meat puppet I hump a few times a week.

Gahhh, you people are so simple-minded. There's a clear male-female dominance pattern in nature that is just part of nature. It's not treating someone like your intellectual inferior... it's not being a slave-driver, and it's not treating them like shit. It just is what it is. Why can't some people grasp that?

 

[PaulConventionWV]

lol I love how it says fleshlight on the side like doesn't that defeat the whole point of it looking like a flashlight?

Umm... no?

 

[Carlybee]

You were the one who said "kinky sex life" as if that was the definition of goodness in marriage.

FWIW, I kind of agree with him. Women can be independent all they want, but I would rather my wife was submissive because, well, it's just the natural order of things. The men are the protectors and the providers. The women have children and manage the household.

I don't think there's anything sexist about that. Would you rather be an expendable male who has to do the hard work and face danger for the sake of his wife and kids? It's just a natural fact that men, being stronger and more physically equipped, do these things and the women, being the ones who can bear children, do what they do to take care of the children and keep their man happy enough to face the challenges he faces every day for her sake.

I'm not saying everyone should do that. By all means, be a strong, independent woman and do the hard jobs, but I think you'll find you're not really marriage material if that's the case. If you do find a man who can deal with that, good for you. I just don't want my marriage to be like that and I think it will make things harder in your life down the road (perhaps not specifically you, but you get the gist).

That's not always the case. I've worked my whole life. Very few women at least where I live are stay at home wives. Most marriages nowadays take two incomes. Not that there's anything wrong with staying home if it's affordable and if that's what you want to do but I can't imagine it because I've never done it other than a while after my son was born. Some people are meant to do what they do and are not meant to be subservient. I'm sure not. My husband and I are partners not master and servant.

 

[PaulConventionWV]

Dating...LOL

Try that shit after being married 20 or 30 years.

She'll clap you upside your head with a frying pan.

ETA - And I maintain it is more true than not.

The protagonist of 50 Shades is hot to women because he is fabulously wealthy.

I really don't get it. Of course he wouldn't try dating after being married 20 or 30 years!!

Isn't that the point of being married? I'm guessing he hasn't been married AT ALL, much less 20 or 30 years, so why advise him to "try that shit" if he's not even married yet? Dating is not for people who are married, so it's not really relevant to his post.

 

[tod evans]

I understand, but I really think it has to do with how a person changes over time. For instance, my dad was probably a pretty cool guy when he was young and married my mom in Illinois, but when they moved to WV together and had 6 kids, my dad became kind of a hick and lost some of his teeth and generally doesn't seem to have anything in the way of social skills anymore, which he may have had decades ago when he was young. My mom, on the other hand, doesn't seem to have changed much, at least from what I can tell about how she was when she was young.

Obviously I don't know your dad but have you ever stopped to think that maybe losing his family, his home and being forced by the government to fork over 50% of his before tax income might possibly have had something to do with his poor attitude and dental care?

 

[PaulConventionWV]

Ok, we'll come back here and see who's right in a hundred years.

Count on it.

Theye have managed to manipulate the most base and core instincts against us, why not sex as well?

And idiot humanity will gleefully follow along.

Sorry, I'm going to have to go with CL on this one. The overlords seem to promote sexual promiscuity, not repress it. From what I can tell, that's the way they want it. Sexual promiscuity messages are all over the place, and it makes sense considering that blindly chasing tail is a pretty effective way of distracting yourself from the more serious reality of your world and the higher calling that fixing it would entail.

Don't be fooled by thinking that feminism is just a way to ban sex. It's about dividing people against themselves and getting women to be more taxable. It doesn't really have anything to do with sex. It's just trying to flip the traditional family on its head in every way it can.

 

[Suzanimal]

I really don't get it. Of course he wouldn't try dating after being married 20 or 30 years!!

Isn't that the point of being married? I'm guessing he hasn't been married AT ALL, much less 20 or 30 years, so why advise him to "try that shit" if he's not even married yet? Dating is not for people who are married, so it's not really relevant to his post.

I disagree, "dating" your spouse keeps things fresh. I highly recommend meeting your spouse somewhere, pretending like you don't know each other, and seeing if you can pick each other up - it's fun!

 

[tod evans]

I disagree, "dating" your spouse keeps things fresh. I highly recommend meeting your spouse somewhere, pretending like you don't know each other, and seeing if you can pick each other up - it's fun!

So are many other role playing scenarios, the brain is humankind's most important sex organ, neglect it at your own peril....

 

[PaulConventionWV]

That's not always the case. I've worked my whole life. Very few women at least where I live are stay at home wives. Most marriages nowadays take two incomes. Not that there's anything wrong with staying home if it's affordable and if that's what you want to do but I can't imagine it because I've never done it other than a while after my son was born. Some people are meant to do what they do and are not meant to be subservient. I'm sure not. My husband and I are partners not master and servant.

You keep attaching buzz phrases to it like "master and servant." That's not what dominant/submissive is about. You may not be the subservient type, but I'm betting at least some of that has to do with the 21st century culture that you're living in and were probably exposed to relatively early in your life. I'm no exception because I'm still relatively young myself, but I understand why men being dominant and women being submissive has nothing to do with some kind of oppressive social patriarchy. It's just the way things naturally are according to the survival needs of the species and maximizing well-being and happiness. People are happiest, I believe, when they do what is the most efficient, and males and females seem to be equipped for different but complementary roles in society. If that's not the way you are, I'm not going to shame you, but I really just think it's better this (or, rather, that, since it's been relegated to the past) way.

 

[PaulConventionWV]

Obviously I don't know your dad but have you ever stopped to think that maybe losing his family, his home and being forced by the government to fork over 50% of his before tax income might possibly have had something to do with his poor attitude and dental care?

You're right, you don't know, so why are you trying to tell me this? Do you think I am not aware of the progression of events? This was going on well before he lost his family and home and what-have-you. In fact, it was directly causal to the fact that he lost his home. I don't think it was right, but it was part of the reason my mom divorced him. I know because, well, I was there.

 

[PaulConventionWV]

I disagree, "dating" your spouse keeps things fresh. I highly recommend meeting your spouse somewhere, pretending like you don't know each other, and seeing if you can pick each other up - it's fun!

Oh, you're right. I assumed he meant dating other people, as in "currently dating three women", which was in the post he was replying to.

 

[tod evans]

You're right, you don't know, so why are you trying to tell me this? Do you think I am not aware of the progression of events? This was going on well before he lost his family and home and what-have-you. In fact, it was directly causal to the fact that he lost his home. I don't think it was right, but it was part of the reason my mom divorced him. I know because, well, I was there.

Bit sensitive are you?

I sincerely hope you and your father are able to sit down before he passes and have a heart to heart, man to man discussion.

Whenever a family fails there are two sides as to why and sitting out here in cyberville it sure sounds like you've accepted one side as gospel.

Most folks are best served by a healthy relationship with both their parents, I wish that for you.



Oh- I wasn't "telling" you anything, I asked if you had considered........

 

[Carlybee]

You keep attaching buzz phrases to it like "master and servant." That's not what dominant/submissive is about. You may not be the subservient type, but I'm betting at least some of that has to do with the 21st century culture that you're living in and were probably exposed to relatively early in your life. I'm no exception because I'm still relatively young myself, but I understand why men being dominant and women being submissive has nothing to do with some kind of oppressive social patriarchy. It's just the way things naturally are according to the survival needs of the species and maximizing well-being and happiness. People are happiest, I believe, when they do what is the most efficient, and males and females seem to be equipped for different but complementary roles in society. If that's not the way you are, I'm not going to shame you, but I really just think it's better this (or, rather, that, since it's been relegated to the past) way.

You are entitled to your opinion. Talk to me in 20 years. Life has a way of becoming anything but how you think it should be.

 

[PaulConventionWV]

Bit sensitive are you?

I sincerely hope you and your father are able to sit down before he passes and have a heart to heart, man to man discussion.

Whenever a family fails there are two sides as to why and sitting out here in cyberville it sure sounds like you've accepted one side as gospel.

Most folks are best served by a healthy relationship with both their parents, I wish that for you.



Oh- I wasn't "telling" you anything, I asked if you had considered........

This is why I'm getting annoyed. You keep assuming things, like that me and my father aren't on good terms, and that I agree with my mother, which I actually kind of don't, even though I can see that it's made her happier. It's a complicated issue, so I would appreciate it if you just don't tell me to consider things that would frankly be weird if I hadn't, considering I was around when it happened.