Draft of USA Today Ad

[austin356]

Horrible idea. Absolutely mockingly horrible.. What is with you busybodies on this thread. No question mark because it is a rhetorical statement.

Randy


Randy

Thanks for saying it.


-Austin

 

[Ron Paul in 2008]

I believe the reference to a draft should remain in the ad, because it promotes dialogue among Americans as to how further interventions in ever more places will be managed without one.

This will get the moms to look at RP and his message.

JMO.

MsD

I strongly believe the draft reference should be taken out. The ad is to promote Ron Paul, not a national dialogue. Once we get him the nomination the dialogue will start. Personally, if I was reading the ad and read the military draft part I would probably brush it aside. Basically, lets not say more than necessary. Leaving it at saying we shouldnt be fighting wars overseas is more than enough. The draft sounds like speculation/conspiracy. People have been saying for years that Iraq would have a draft and we never did. I highly doubt we will have a draft as it will be political suicide for anyone.

I also will restate that every Would should be changed to Will. It sounds more decisive.

 

[Revolution9]

I think it would be better to mention stuff about Ron Paul.

God fearing Christian,.

Wrong. Poeple will get the impression he is a part of the evangelical theocracy and not the kind of Christian you mean. That word "God fearing" is dirty in many parts of the country where there are huge pockets of urban voters who feel that the evangelicals are control freaks wielding the cudgel of Gods wrath and fearmongering based on this premise.. They will not easily make the distinction. This is not about religion anyways. This is about The Presidency and religion should not be a public part of it. We all may pray for Ron as we see fit..or not as our internal beliefs may be..but there are alot of non-christian secular folks as well as Wiccans, Jews, Muslims, Hindus, Buddhists and the various Native and shamanic religions as wel here in the melting pot of America.

I do not fear God. I was told by my church elders when i was an altar boy that Jesus came to do away with the Old testament Law and God was not to be feared as he loved me.. So..why should I fear the wrathful deity of the old testament when he has the characteristics of a war god and a Molochian set of rituals and mindset paradigms.

Best
Randy

 

[max]

I can tell you that a lot of people will instantly skip this ad simply because of the draft statement. Is there any proof to this at all? If there isn't, scrap it asap.

just becareful your plan doesn't backfire.

this is the same CRAP we heard from the naysayers of Nov. 5th...

FYI.....there IS talk of a draft...you havent been following..RP himself has said it

do u really think we could occupy Iran without a draft??

To the gentleman running this ad with HIS money....pay no mind to these naysayers...JUST DO IT BABY!

 

[traitorist]

Wrong. This is not about religion anyways.

yet your whole post WAS about your religion?

 

[amonasro]

There is talk of a draft, isn't there always when our military is becoming overextended and recruitment is low? However, there is no imminent draft plan in the works. I think it should be rephrased, otherwise the ad is perfect.

 

[european]

Oke here is my feedback. I know this is a huge amount of money, and I deeply respect you for making this move. People like you make people like me believe in America again. To honor your move I did my little check on your great ad. I used my salesbackground to see which improvements there could be made. I must say upfront that due to culture differences, the strategies that work in Europe might not apply in America, but still I want to share my 2 cents.
Some golden rules I always teached my salesteams and accountteams:
- rule number 1 - 5 are all the same: What Is In It For Me? Think like your (potential) customer. What would trigger him/her, what is important to him/her? don't sell on USPs, sell by knowing what the person is looking for. The USPs are nice to name later.
- people will buy when they like you / children are gold
anyways, that way you can place my criticism into context, so here we go:

• 
  Great eyecatcher at the top with the photos the background and the title (perfect title).
  "but we have strayed from their wise counsel"
  maybe replace with positive words: "now it is time to life up to their wise counsel". Or something alike, english isn't my first language so probably i'm not that good in using poetic sentences.

• 
  ...warned of the dangers of excessive taxation. Now you must labor nearly six months of the year to pay your taxes at all levels as the economy groans beneath the cruel burden. Ron Paul would reduce taxes and eliminate the IRS.
  
  I actually learned about Ron Paul when I was watching Freedom to Fascism of Aaron Russo. I did a background check of some people in that documentary because I had a hard time believing the statements made. Abolishing the IRS seems hard to believe. Also the interviews I have seen, in which this issue was adressed, the journalists always ask "how" because its such a revolutionary thought. People have a hard time believing it. Maybe add: Ron Paul would reduce taxes and eliminate the IRS. We will still have the same tax-income as in the year 2000 and we save bilions of dollars by withdrawing our troops.
  Or at least something like that. Adds to the credibility of this opening line and its a bridge to the 2nd point aswell.

• 
  ...warned of the dangers of political parties. Now you have two powerful parties that conspire against the people, plundering you while they pretend to oppose each other. Ron Paul would return the government to the people.
  I'm not american so i'm not sure how people feel in your country. This seems a bit conspiracy like though. Specially since that word is used. I'm not sure how people will feel when they read this. Probably part will like it, and a part will be turned away by it. Specially with the "crazy" image of Ron Paul supporters im not sure if such a thing should be included. Might be good to get rid of the "crazy" image to open the door to new voters.

• 
  ...warned of the importance of an honest, independent and unbiased press. Now your centralized "Mainstream Media" is full of propaganda, distortions, and omissions. Ron Paul would communicate honestly.
  This advertisement is placed in one of the most populair mainstream media of america. My question is: Does this bulletpoint add to the credibility of your message in the eyes of the people that buy this newspaper?

• 
  "For these reasons, We The Founters support the"
  I read this comment before. It is a bit pretentious in my eyes. adding the word "would" adds to the credibility and still holds the same message value.
  Same goes for "We advise you to support" which might be better if it was "we would advise you to support".

• 
  Raising $4,3 million in one day got their attention. Who's attention? What is so special about $4,3 million? I read in the newspaper about billions every day. Maybe state something like: raising $4,3 million in one day made headlines. or something like that.
  Join us on December 16th.. Join the 80.000 donors for the largest one-day... etc. According to http://ronpaulgraphs.com/total_donors.html there have been 80k+ donors, which sound more impressive then "us".

• 
  The bulletpoints at the left and the right bottomsides are great in my opinion. Not cluttered at all. The lines are put in by a genius, it devides the parts perfectly which makes it very well readable.

/me bows for L.

 

[traitorist]

the OP asked for people's thoughts on the ad. some folks here have a real problem with hearing people's legitimate critiques and ideas, don't they?

 

[Bryan]

the OP asked for people's thoughts on the ad. some folks here have a real problem with hearing people's legitimate critiques and ideas, don't they?

Let's just keep it civil.

 

[jb4ronpaul]

Oke here is my feedback. I know this is a huge amount of money, and I deeply respect you for making this move. People like you make people like me believe in America again. To honor your move I did my little check on your great ad. I used my salesbackground to see which improvements there could be made. I must say upfront that due to culture differences, the strategies that work in Europe might not apply in America, but still I want to share my 2 cents.
Some golden rules I always teached my salesteams and accountteams:
- rule number 1 - 5 are all the same: What Is In It For Me? Think like your (potential) customer. What would trigger him/her, what is important to him/her? don't sell on USPs, sell by knowing what the person is looking for. The USPs are nice to name later.
- people will buy when they like you / children are gold
anyways, that way you can place my criticism into context, so here we go:

• 
  Great eyecatcher at the top with the photos the background and the title (perfect title).
  "but we have strayed from their wise counsel"
  maybe replace with positive words: "now it is time to life up to their wise counsel". Or something alike, english isn't my first language so probably i'm not that good in using poetic sentences.

• 
  ...warned of the dangers of excessive taxation. Now you must labor nearly six months of the year to pay your taxes at all levels as the economy groans beneath the cruel burden. Ron Paul would reduce taxes and eliminate the IRS.
  
  I actually learned about Ron Paul when I was watching Freedom to Fascism of Aaron Russo. I did a background check of some people in that documentary because I had a hard time believing the statements made. Abolishing the IRS seems hard to believe. Also the interviews I have seen, in which this issue was adressed, the journalists always ask "how" because its such a revolutionary thought. People have a hard time believing it. Maybe add: Ron Paul would reduce taxes and eliminate the IRS. We will still have the same tax-income as in the year 2000 and we save bilions of dollars by withdrawing our troops.
  Or at least something like that. Adds to the credibility of this opening line and its a bridge to the 2nd point aswell.

• 
  ...warned of the dangers of political parties. Now you have two powerful parties that conspire against the people, plundering you while they pretend to oppose each other. Ron Paul would return the government to the people.
  I'm not american so i'm not sure how people feel in your country. This seems a bit conspiracy like though. Specially since that word is used. I'm not sure how people will feel when they read this. Probably part will like it, and a part will be turned away by it. Specially with the "crazy" image of Ron Paul supporters im not sure if such a thing should be included. Might be good to get rid of the "crazy" image to open the door to new voters.

• 
  ...warned of the importance of an honest, independent and unbiased press. Now your centralized "Mainstream Media" is full of propaganda, distortions, and omissions. Ron Paul would communicate honestly.
  This advertisement is placed in one of the most populair mainstream media of america. My question is: Does this bulletpoint add to the credibility of your message in the eyes of the people that buy this newspaper?

• 
  "For these reasons, We The Founters support the"
  I read this comment before. It is a bit pretentious in my eyes. adding the word "would" adds to the credibility and still holds the same message value.
  Same goes for "We advise you to support" which might be better if it was "we would advise you to support".

• 
  Raising $4,3 million in one day got their attention. Who's attention? What is so special about $4,3 million? I read in the newspaper about billions every day. Maybe state something like: raising $4,3 million in one day made headlines. or something like that.
  Join us on December 16th.. Join the 80.000 donors for the largest one-day... etc. According to http://ronpaulgraphs.com/total_donors.html there have been 80k+ donors, which sound more impressive then "us".

• 
  The bulletpoints at the left and the right bottomsides are great in my opinion. Not cluttered at all. The lines are put in by a genius, it devides the parts perfectly which makes it very well readable.

/me bows for L.

Lots of great feedback here. To reach the largest audience, considering it is USA Today also, I would think it a good idea to remove some of the more radical points (makes it less wordy too so more people are likely to read) and reword some of the points to sound more positive. I would think it's best to reach out to the average American with this as much as possible. I have seen that that flier is even a bit of a turn off for some people who are already Ron Paul supporters, so I would think so much more for an average person.

 

[DJ RP]

Oke here is my feedback. ..

...

Great constructive Feedback.

Guys there is a difference between offering feedback in a good way, being courteous and explaining your reasoning and being disrespectful to other people's ideas.

A lot of the feedback in this thread is good constructive feedback that could maximise the potential of the advert. Some of the posters though just come across like negative naysayers who love to bring people down because it makes them feel good.

 

[madcat033]

Wow... a full page ad in USA Today? Dude, you fucking ROCK!

This is a huge contribution to the campaign. Thank you!

 

[traitorist]

To the gentleman running this ad with HIS money....pay no mind to these naysayers...JUST DO IT BABY!

HIS money, yes, OUR candidate.

again, the OP asked for people's thoughts on the ad. people are giving very good constructive criticism, and in the spirit of Ron Paul's campaign, I think it wise to hear what "the people" think about it.

one thing to consider is that the opposition (no doubt they are even here watching what we are doing) will use any and all opportunities to tar and feather Ron Paul. it is WISE to think all things through as far as ads go, especially the one that will have the reach of this one.

you don't think that the ad is going to just fall in to FRIENDLY hands do you? those in power that oppose what Dr. Paul stands for will use whatever means they can to make sure he does not win the nomination. don't give them any freebies.

i'll take wisdom over foolish pride any day.

 

[surf]

Thanks. That's all i have to say. i like it.

 

[traitorist]

Let's just keep it civil.

agreed.

 

[Pete Kay]

It needs work, but is very okay overall. It looks a bit too much like a local ad, not an ad that you would see in a national newspaper. I strongly suggest that you submit this ad for editting amongst the supporters and pick the best design. There are great graphic artists here.

*I like the idea of showing what the Founding Fathers said, but I am strongly against saying that the Founding Fathers actually support Ron Paul. That is an outright lie. They are dead. That actually offends me very much. Imagine if any other candidate made that claim. Or said that Ronald Reagan supported them.

I think that ad needs to display Ron Paul more prominently.

Also this should not be called an "open letter" when it's not written as a letter but more like an advertisement.

*I reccomend having quotes from the Founders, Lincoln, and Reagan then showing Ron Paul's quotes. This was very effective in the "Stop Dreaming" video and goes to show the wisdom of Ron Paul.

 

[Jmaths117]

Hi folks.

This is a good ad if you are aiming it towards Ron Paul supporters.

Whoever designed this ad must realize that the average person does not know what you know about Ron Paul. We have ideas in ours heads that make this ad intriguing and easy to understand when you already know about Ron Paul, but when you have no clue who he is, there are several elements that are off-putting.

1. Many people mentioned putting words in the Founders' mouths. This cannot be done.

2. Eliminate all conspiracy-like words. People are conditioned to feel an aversion towards conspiracy theories, so this would make people stop reading.

3. Elaborate more on certain subjects, such as the $4.2 million in one day. Explain why that is significant.

4. Word choice must be changed in many places. Lots of posts in this thread provide better word choice.

5. Instead of saying "you" say "we".

Everything else is great. It's eye-catching, easy to read, and well-organized. I like how it constantly repeats Ron Paul's name.

I am extremely grateful that you sacrificed the amount of money that you did. You have no idea how ipmortant this could be if done correctly. Perhaps you could contact a professional advertisement agency for help, if you have no already done so. Or perhaps someone else could.

Thanks for reading.

 

[Naraku]

I'd just like to highlight the positive points of this ad first:

I think everyone here is forgetting how people read an ad or newspaper. People skim first, read second.

People are going to read the big text introducing this, maybe read a few of the "warnings" and then look at where it mentions Ron Paul. Then they'll maybe read the warning in a little more detail say, "Well I'm not sure about this, but I like that!"

Then if people are really interested they'll read further on his record and life history as well as the Tea Party since that's prominent.

Also, I think some of you are assuming too much about people. Most actually would agree with the sentiment that government is deliberately allowing illegal immigration, destroying people's saving, that the party system is screwed up, and hardly anyone's different, a lot of people like the idea of getting rid of the IRS and income tax, though they'd want to know how you do it, and the planning of a draft is something people understand is being pushed by some. Most will not read these things and say, "I'm not gonna read this advertisement." The fact is, people react to ads differently from articles and political speeches. They'll read what interests them and if enough points interest them or one really stircks out, they'll look into it more.

Having the Founders dress down the reader is, I think, a very crucial hook for this advertisement. The idea is that if the Founders saw what our country was like today, they'd be pissed. This conveys the message really well.

My problems with this are not that big.

The BIGGEST thing is RON PAUL IS A REPUBLICAN RUNNING IN THE REPUBLICAN PRIMARIES. There is no mention of this anywhere in the ad, which I think is absolutely crucial to at least be mentioned.

Also I believe the Media mention should be altered because it has nothing to do with Ron Paul and government. Instead put something in about flip-flopping or deceitful politicians using talking points and rehearsed answers. That way Ron Paul communicating honestly makes more sense.

 

[TexicanLady]

I would change the wording slightly to make it more positive. For example: On the 4th warning line I would put "Ron Paul WILL stop inflation by restoring real money". The word "would" leaves me with the impression that he "would" have done something IF he could have. The word "will" puts more of a mindset that he IS going to win and make those changes. Everywhere that it says "Ron Paul would", needs to say "Ron Paul will" Think Positive! He WILL do those things because he WILL win the election.

ETA: I've read repeatedly that the candidate who's name is seen and heard the most will win (even if the publicity they are getting isn't very good.) The most important thing is to get his name in front of high numbers of people and get it there often.

 

[JMO]

I don't think the Negatives are bad, people in America love and fear negative news. if you candy coat it you won't grab the attention as well. the average voter wants to feel that if we don't vote for this candidate we are doomed.