Fifth Draft of USA Today Ad -- Really about final!!

[torchbearer]

That was nicely put, but terribly harsh in it's implication - uncalled for.

I'm confident that Max want's to win AND has the necessary good sense to get there.

And I'd love to know where you see the big picture in this travesty.

travesty in the big picture or big picture in the travesty?

 

[max]

That was nicely put, but terribly harsh in it's implication - uncalled for.

I'm confident that Max want's to win AND has the necessary good sense to get there.

And I'd love to know where you see the big picture in this travesty.

it is his money....so lets be respectful...

larry is one of the heroes of this forum and he's just as ballsy as we are....i just think the naysayers had him second guessing...

they almost got in my head when i ran the original in NH...it's a real mind f***...

 

[speciallyblend]

naysayers have been wrong like george w bush,so dont really listen to them,follow your heart

 

[Man from La Mancha]

That was nicely put, but terribly harsh in it's implication - uncalled for.

I'm confident that Max want's to win AND has the necessary good sense to get there.

And I'd love to know where you see the big picture in this travesty.

Just a difference of opinion from life experiences. With out Max this ad would not be this good and without Llepard it would not be possible . So I thank God for both of them and I sure have gotten a lot of entertainment out of all of this. I love you guys.



....copy,paste,linked to teaparty07.com , either one

 

[tremendoustie]

I just want to say, I think all of these versions are really quite good, and any of them will have an enormously positive impact. I deeply thank llepard for his extrordinary generosity, and I can't wait to see it in the USA Today! Also, getting lots of ideas and opinions is important, but sometimes one needs an individual to make final decisions, and to protect an overall vision. I think we've all aired lots of ideas, and if there are any remaining changes llepard wants to make, or any cases where he'd like to revert to an older version, he should do it, and send it to print. This is going to be absolutely epic, in any case! Thanks so much!

 

[acmegeek]

Another design revision, changed quite a bit...

In response to some feedback from others, I have made a NEW design revision.

Please let me know what you think.

Thanks!

 

[Man from La Mancha]

Like it.

.

 

[Aballistar]

Seconded

 

[Dan D.]

I mean the following the most constructive, positive way possible, and don't in any way intend to be disparaging of the work llepard and acmegeek and others have done. That it's down to fairly small stuff like this is an indicator of how well it's coming along.

From top to bottom, on acmegeek's most recent:

I really like the statue of Liberty in the background, but I worry how good that'll look at the 80 dpi most newspapers print at (if that's no longer the case, please correct me!).

I think the term in the Declaration of Independence was "pledge" not "risk" with regards to lives, fortunes, sacred honor. They weren't hedging their bets, and they would have been executed by the crown had they lost. Makes a nice tie-in to the teaparty07 pledge as well.

Why are all the Ron Paul will... bolded bits in parentheses?

The phrasing on the second half of the second sentence of the first warning could be simpler.

"National Security", "National Debt", "Central Bank (The", "Government", "People" should not be capitalized.

Might want to replace or supplement "fiat" with "inflationary". Not necessary though.

"legions" sounds... I don't know, but not good. Sensationalist and hyperbolic, maybe. I'd replace it with "millions"

No periods at the end of the two lines above "For these reasons..."

There seems to be a slight curve to "We the People", but it's subtle to the point that you're not sure if its an optical illusion. It should either be straight or visibly curved.

Bigger picture of Paul!

On the third and fifth checkmark bullets on the left, there are incomplete sentences following complete ones. Add in a "Ron Paul" or "Congressman Ron Paul" before each of them.

Not sure what to do about it, but as President, Paul would not have the authority to end birthright citizenship. He would, however, call for an amendment to do so.

Though I think it's to be removed anyway, and it might be just my eyes, it looks like there's no space between "or" and "special" in "or special interest groups".

 

[Politeia]

"We the People" not "We The People"

There seems to be a slight curve to "We the People", but it's subtle to the point that you're not sure if its an optical illusion. It should either be straight or visibly curved.

This has been noted before; the line is curved, but the reason it looks awkward (and amateurish) is because "The" is capitalized, and the capital "T" is too big. This can be corrected easily by using a lower-case "t": "We the People", which is not only correct typesetting style (articles are customarily not capitalized in titles or headings) but also accurate to the original -- see the upper left corner of this and every Ron Paul Forums webpage. The Constitution begins with "We the People", not "We The People".

 

[wfd40]

Dan D.

Nice points... I agree on pretty much all of them, especially the parenthesis - Those are statements! Let them stand on their own

 

[Man from La Mancha]

I mean the following the most constructive, positive way possible, and don't in any way intend to be disparaging of the work llepard and acmegeek and others have done. That it's down to fairly small stuff like this is an indicator of how well it's coming along".

Welcome aboard, and thanks for the evidently thoughtful comments.

.

 

[Marc]

Hello,

I want to thank the the person making this ad. While I don't mean any dis-respect, I thought of an alternative way to make the ad much easier to read. I just found this ad tonight and my first impressions are that it is a doom and gloom kind of ad. If you ever watch some Mike Gravel speeches - he uses the same tone. It really turns people off when there's negativity. The ad in my opinion should be the positive things Ron Paul will do. I also think there needs to be more white space, it is very hard to read. Again, I don't mean any disrespect. I simply shortened the length of the ad by wording it in a simpler way. You can take it or leave it.

small

 

[Ninja Homer]

I thought I'd take a swing at laying this out differently. All the same elements are there except I replaced "An Open Letter To The American People" with "Ron Paul for President" because I think that's what the focus should be. It could be switched back just as easily.

Keep in mind that I did this very quick and dirty just to see how it would look. Some things are out of proportion, there are some squiggly lines where they should be straight, etc. This was chopped up from acmegeek's version, so you can see the Statue of Liberty background, although it got pretty distorted while moving things around. It's just an attempt at giving it a cleaner, less cluttered feel.

 

[Man from La Mancha]

Thanks Mark, I like all the input, to see differences. Welcome aboard!




....copy,paste,linked to teaparty07.com , either one, only 1 million at $100

 

[Man from La Mancha]

I thought I'd take a swing at laying this out differently. All the same elements are there except I replaced "An Open Letter To The American People" with "Ron Paul for President" because I think that's what the focus should be. It could be switched back just as easily.

Keep in mind that I did this very quick and dirty just to see how it would look. Some things are out of proportion, there are some squiggly lines where they should be straight, etc. This was chopped up from acmegeek's version, so you can see the Statue of Liberty background, although it got pretty distorted while moving things around. It's just an attempt at giving it a cleaner, less cluttered feel.

Nice, I like to see something I have not imagined.

.


....copy,paste,linked to teaparty07.com , either one, only 1 million at $100

 

[llepard]

Dan D.

Nice points... I agree on pretty much all of them, especially the parenthesis - Those are statements! Let them stand on their own

The parenthesis are now out, there is an elipses between each founders statement and what RP would do.

 

[llepard]

How many straw polls were there in total. It might be more informative to say "Ron Paul has placed 1st or 2nd in 27 of X straw polls..." in the line near the bottom.

We thought of that, but what we went with is actually a more positive statement, if you know what i mean.

L

 

[Channing]

My suggestion would be to exchange Franklin with Washington so you would have all portraits facing the reader.

Also a bigger portrait of Ron Paul and a bigger text for "Ron Paul for President".

 

[Libertarian]

All of the revisions look great. It's hard to decide which is best...I think any one of them would be awesome! Thank you again for doing this lep!