The speech that will change the election!

[ForLiberty2012]

We need to Concentrate on a SIMPLE Message that Promotes ONLY Ron. The video in itself should only be 5 minutes or less (in my opinion) and should concentrate solely on WHAT people WANT.

Although the War is a Strong Tool for Ron I believe the Economy and Jobs are a bigger impact in Voters minds.

We should start with JOBS/Economy, Then War, Then Fiscal Responsibility, and Finally FREEDOM (Which is what Breeds so Much Emotion, puts people in tears, etc.)

Finish it up with a "Call to Action" which tells the viewer to DO SOMETHING to Help the Campaign and make Ron the President of the United States of America. My 2 cents.

Good points. I shall make revisions!

 

[Tod]

I would try to get a few senior citizens to participate and try to get most of the people to spruce up a bit for the video (don't want it to look like only youngsters and apparent druggies support Dr. Paul: a broad cross-section to help the most viewers see at least someone in the video that they can point to and think, "that person could be me!"

 

[FA.Hayek]

it'll be awesome if the people reading it can be in front of easily recognizable buildings, scenery, to show the truly national support for Ron Paul all over the U.S.

 

[gb13]

"War threatens our security, places our brave men and women in the military at risk, erodes our prosperity, and has saddled taxpayers with trillions of dollars of debt."

I would add the part in bold. We should express that we value the lives of our people in uniform. We don't want to look as of we're only focused on dollars and cents.

 

[Tod]

I would add the part in bold. We should express that we value the lives of our people in uniform. We don't want to look as of we're only focused on dollars and cents.

good point, gb13!

 

[zakkubin]

This doesn't necessarily apply to this project, but I always thought it would be powerful to have foreigners show their support for Ron's foreign policy. Too many people have this crazy assumption that the world would be upset or laugh at the U.S. for weakening our role in world affairs.

In the last debate, even though we know Paul beat down Sanctorum, many people had the impression he lost and were freighted by the vision of the neocons. That being that Iran's only goal in life is to get a nuke to attack Israel and the U.S. So what if we had some Iranians share their views on the subject? I befriended a few Iranians a few years back on skype and they seemed shocked at what our news coverage and politicians were saying. And after I explained Paul's position they were instant supporters.

 

[Matthew Zak]

I would get rid of words like "faith". No offense, but that's off putting to some people.

 

[satchelmcqueen]

id LOVE to be in this video. send me the speech in pm and ill record myself reading it.

 

[ForLiberty2012]

*Noting all comments*

Thanks everyone! And yes Tod, we do need a diverse group of individuals. Please spread the word!

 

[Tod]

I took the liberty ( ) of attempting to make some of the sentences a bit more dynamic. At first I tried keeping track of original text vs my revisions but it got hard to read...

If you want peace, vote for Ron Paul!

Dr. Ron Paul is the only candidate who will bring our troops home. He is the only veteran in the race and his constitutional foreign policy will correct our current misguided one by extracting us from the past decade's ever-expanding foreign conflicts. Unnecessary war threatens our security, places our brave military men and women at risk, and erodes our prosperity by saddling us with trillions of dollars of debt.

Ron Paul believes in a strong national defense and secure borders. He does not believe in using our military abroad for unconstitutional and immoral interventions that make us a resented global bully and speed us toward bankruptcy. Ron Paul’s message of peace is resonating with Americans, especially those serving in the military. Since his 2008 campaign, Ron Paul has consistently received more donations from the military than any other candidate, and just recently received more donations than all the rest of the candidates combined.

If you believe our government is too big and spending is out of control, vote for Ron Paul!

In twelve Congressional terms, Dr. Paul has never once voted for a tax increase, nor has he ever voted for an unbalanced budget. Ron Paul has never voted for any federal restriction on gun ownership. Ron Paul has never voted to raise congressional pay or to increase the power of government. He voted against the PATRIOT Act and the Iraq War. He voted against regulating the internet. Our nation is in a crisis and we need a leader who will steadfastly insist on more liberty for Americans and will take the necessary steps to restore America now. Ron Paul has been the leading voice for a limited government since his first days in congress in 1976.

Ron Paul believes that the federal government’s role is simple: to protect our rights and freedoms as individuals. To that end, Ron Paul has stated that he would like to phase out the IRS, and offer alternatives for Americans to opt out of the system of debt and entitlements. It is Dr. Paul's goal to hold the Federal Reserve Bank transparent to the citizens, accountable to them for their actions, and stop blindly printing money, the cause of runaway inflation. He believes in the free market: the only true solution to our economic crisis is not government intervention through regulation, bail-outs, and manipulating interest rates, but by allowing the market to correct itself naturally.

Dr. Paul's 2008 presidential campaign sparked a revolution and inspired the creation of the Tea Party, which advocates following our constitution through limited government and fiscal responsibility, a broad departure from the current policies under which this nation operates and which are driving it toward bankruptcy and threatening the global economy.

If you want consistency and honesty instead of the same old political rhetoric, vote for Ron Paul!

If you are fed up with broken promises, massive unemployment, and deceitful warfare, stop voting for the status quo. Vote for Ron Paul: he truly is different and had demonstrated it by consistently voting based on principle rather than merely checking the political wind.

Vote for someone you can trust: vote for Ron Paul. Dr. Paul has spent his entire political tenure as a US Representative fighting so that we might be a free, just, and prosperous nation. Ron Paul remains the most consistent member of congress in his defense of personal liberty, as well as strictly limiting the government to the provisions outlined in the Constitution. If it is not explicitly authorized in the Constitution or if it infringes on our civil liberties, Ron Paul routinely votes “No”. We need someone with personal integrity, good values, and a track record to back up his talk. That someone is Ron Paul!

If you believe in living your life as you wish, and not by government dictates, vote for Ron Paul!

Ron Paul takes personal freedom very seriously and as such believes in liberty for all. Liberty to live, work, worship, play, love, and generally act in accord with the dictates of one's conscience, the only restriction being that against bringing harm to others. He seeks not to exclude, marginalize, or otherwise abuse any peaceable persons. His inclusive message is one of peace, harmony, happiness, opportunity, and prosperity for each and every one of us.

If you agree with what Ron Paul stands for, vote for him!

It doesn’t matter if you’re a democrat, republican, or independent. Ron Paul unites individuals of all races, backgrounds, religions, and political affiliations. His message is simple: for government to operate within the strict limits of the Constitution and for it to protect our personal liberties so that Americans can be free and prosperous and live out their lives as they wish. Ron Paul has been the leading voice for these things for over thirty years.

As a fellow American who cares about the great nation we call home, the United States of America, I invite you to join the revolution. We can make this happen. We have a duty to ourselves, our families, friends, communities, our country, and to the rest of the world – to set the example and to restore peace, liberty, and prosperity for all.

Help restore America in 2012. You can do it if you have faith and you act. Please spread the word and vote for Ron Paul!!!

 

[Tod]

I just recorded myself reading the speech and it took about 6 min, 50 sec and, in watching it, it did seem a little bit long and almost repetitious, although probably it was just because I was looking at my ugly mug the whole time (enough to make even the shortest video too long! )

 

[joebus36]

I'm 18 and I could give you a young reader and my mom would also be willing to read, she could give you a middle aged woman. If you are lacking in those areas let me know. The only issue is whether or not my camera records in HD.

 

[boneyard bill]

Ronald Reagan was the master of metaphor. He was "the Great Communicator" because he gave us images in addition to ideas. He spoke of the "safety net," of "Morning in America." Our astronauts did not die. They "touched the face of God." If you want your speech to inspiring then you need to think of inspiring images and phrases that capture these ideas in few words, not many.

Here is my suggestion for your first paragraph:

"Ron Paul believes in peace through strength. The value of strength rests not in the desire to win but in the desire not to fight. War does not represent the goal of policy but its' failure. For Ron Paul our soldiers overseas serve, not as defenders of our soil, but as targets for our enemies. Let them serve proudly, but let them serve at home.

We spend hundreds of billions of dollars overseas for our troops to defend the soil of other lands. Thousands, perhaps millions, prosper from the this support while millions go unemployed here at home. Ron Paul would return the troops, and the money, to our shores to protect our liberty and allow our citizens to prosper."

Ok, I'm no Ronald Reagan. There are no killer metaphors here, only weak ones. But I hope you get the idea. Throw in some literary devices. Use metaphors, use alliteration, use antithesis, but use fewer words.

 

[Suzu]

Now we need your critiques/comments so that we can perfect the message

Thanks for your help!

When you're writing about a person, you use "who" rather than "that", as in "The only candidate who..."

And, by the way, Perry is a veteran.

 

[Suzu]

Ron Paul believes in peace through strength. The value of strength rests not in the desire to win but in the desire not to fight. War does not represent the goal of policy but its' failure. For Ron Paul our soldiers overseas serve, not as defenders of our soil nation, but as targets for our enemies.

Minor corrections.

 

[Cleaner44]

So I am probably going to ask John Mayer, the musician, to pitch in on this. I have gotten in contact with his management and they want details. I got the idea from a thread at the Daily Paul, see here:
http://www.dailypaul.com/176298/drafting-john-mayer

It would be an easy request with minimal burden for him. It could also open the door for more in depth projects later if he were so inclined.

Sound good?

 

[Sjmfury]

^ Cool.

 

[LibertasPraesidium]

"Ron Paul believes in peace through strength!

The value of strength rests not in the desire to win, but in the wisdom and desire to not engage military forces that are not necessary. For Ron Paul, our soldiers overseas serve, not as defenders of our Nation but as targets for our enemies. Let them serve proudly, for when America goes to war it should be a quick, thought out, clear ending campaign, not some politics and overbearing platitudes pushing for military action in nations that should be left alone. War does not represent the goal of policy but shows its failure.

We spend hundreds of billions of dollars overseas for our troops to defend themselves in foreign lands. Thousands, perhaps millions, prosper from this military action, while millions go unemployed here at home. Ron Paul would return the troops, and the money, to our shores to protect and secure our liberty and allow our citizens to prosper.

 

[boneyard bill]

"Ron Paul believes in peace through strength!

The value of strength rests not in the desire to win, but in the wisdom and desire to not engage military forces that are not necessary. For Ron Paul, our soldiers overseas serve, not as defenders of our nation but as targets for our enemies. Let them serve proudly, but let them serve briefly with clear aims and necessary goals. Peace through strength means that war is not the culmination of policy but the representation of its faiure.

We spend hundreds of billions of dollars overseas for our troops to defend themselves in foreign lands. Thousands, perhaps millions, prosper from this military presence, while millions go unemployed here at home. Ron Paul would return the troops, and the money, to our shores to protect and secure our liberty and allow our citizens to prosper.

I like some of your changes but others are a bit too wordy. Keep in mind that this is a spoken address so cadence and rhythm are important. You have to keep the audience from nodding off.

]"Ron Paul believes in peace through strength!

The value of strength rests not in the desire to win, but in the wisdom not to fight needlessly. As Ron Paul sees it, our soldiers overseas currently serve, not as defenders of our nation but as targets for our enemies. Let them serve proudly, but let them serve briefly with clear aims and necessary goals. Peace through strength means that war is not the fulfillment of policy but the representation of its failure.

We spend hundreds of billions of dollars overseas for our troops to defend themselves in foreign lands. Thousands, perhaps millions, prosper from this military presence, while millions go unemployed here at home. Ron Paul would return the troops, and the money, to our shores to protect our liberty and allow our citizens to prosper.[/QUOTE]

 

[Stefan]

This doesn't necessarily apply to this project, but I always thought it would be powerful to have foreigners show their support for Ron's foreign policy. Too many people have this crazy assumption that the world would be upset or laugh at the U.S. for weakening our role in world affairs.

I'm in! Sign me up!

Now you got yourself a foreigner