Ron Paul Jokes ;)

[cascade77]

My favourite till now:
"Nothing can escape the gravity of a black hole, except for Ron Paul... Ron eats black holes. They taste like chicken."
Yours?

 

[Roxi]

bump

 

[0zzy]

Ron Paul doesn't deliver babies with his hands. He simply reads them the Bill of Rights and they crawl out in anticipation of freedom.

 

[0zzy]

Ron Paul is like kryptonite to Rudy Giuliani.

The government tried to steal once. Ron Paul made it sit in time out.

 

[CCTelander]

Ron Paul is like kryptonite to Rudy Giuliani.

The government tried to steal once. Ron Paul made it sit in time out.

Once?!?

 

[Trance Dance Master]

Ron Paul Jokes

We (should) all know that Dr. Ron Paul is a ob/gyn. This means:

- Dr. Paul believes in 'open' government

- Any votes Dr. Ron Paul receives in the primary will be considered a 'split vote'

- Unlike Bill Clinton, none of Dr. Paul's women enjoyed the experience

- The Dr. Ron Paul administration will now refer to it as "The Ovary Office"

- Dr. Ron Paul will bring a new meaning to the phrase "smear campaign"

- During Ron Paul's presidency, ketchup, tuna, and yeast will be banned form state dinners

- Dr. Ron Paul has experience in removing foreign objects from the human body. Therefore cigars will again be considered safe in the White House.

- Dr. Ron Paul deals with the nastiest, filthiest, scummy, and most raunchy between-the-leg diseases known to man... and that's just talking about his fellow members of Congress

- If you are lucky enough to get to meet Dr. Ron Paul in person, don't offer to shake his hand, ask to sniff it instead

- In order to better understand the Mid East situation, Dr. Ron Paul will view the film 'Lawrence of A Labia'

- When Dr. Ron Paul is president hopefully he can avoid any assassination attempts. During his medical practice he already had to dodge stuff shooting out of the grassy knoll

- When Dr. Ron Paul is president he will hope and pray that Hillary doesn't come in for a 'check-up'

- Dr. Ron Paul knows how to handle all types of fallopian fungus... but enough about the U.N.

- An obvious proponent of small government, when asked about the current president's expansion of the budget, Dr. Ron Paul thinks that 'Bush just gets in the way'

- Dr. Ron Paul was examining a psychic patient on the rag and got his palm red

- Some people are worried about Dr. Paul's age. If he happens to go deaf, we can take comfort in the fact that he knows how to read lips

- Dr. Ron Paul thinks government screws up often. He came to this conclusion after noticing that just like his female patients, a playground is always built next to a sewer

 

[yaz]

www.ronpaulfacts.com


the end

 

[Nate K]

these were the jokes i was pushing for on the facebook forums if anyone remembers..



keep'em up

 

[cascade77]

Another one

Ron Paul can be unlocked on the hardest level of Tekken. But only Ron Paul is skilled enough to unlock himself. Then he dropkicks the Playstation back to Japan.

 

[Starks]

Ron Paul doesn't deliver babies with his hands. He simply reads them the Bill of Rights and they crawl out in anticipation of freedom.

I lol'd.

 

[cascade77]

Thanks! Good work!

 

[Matt Collins]

//

 

[Matt Collins]

//

 

[Thomas_Paine]

"Ron Paul is like finding a Virgin in a Whorehouse (Congress)"

 

[Roxi]

Time capsule thread.

 

[sailingaway]

Ron Paul let the dogs out. They were being held without due process.

When fascism goes to sleep at night, it checks under the
bed for Ron Paul.

Ron Paul is 9 feet tall, but the weight of his conscience makes
him look shorter.

Ron Paul has no alarm clock, but instead wakes every morning to the
call of freedom.

 

[ChristianAnarchist]

SEE THIS THREAD:
http://www.ronpaulforums.com/showthread.php?t=27545






.

ChristianAnarchist, you do not have permission to access this page. This could be due to one of several reasons:

Your user account may not have sufficient privileges to access this page. Are you trying to edit someone else's post, access administrative features or some other privileged system?
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[Michael Landon]

ChristianAnarchist, you do not have permission to access this page. This could be due to one of several reasons:

Your user account may not have sufficient privileges to access this page. Are you trying to edit someone else's post, access administrative features or some other privileged system?
If you are trying to post, the administrator may have disabled your account, or it may be awaiting activation.

What sort of evil doing is this?! Even the mighty Landon fails to gain access to this page!!

- ML

 

[sailingaway]

it is in archives. A lot of it you really don't want to see, even matt edited out his own OP it looks like.

This is suitable for family viewing though:

OK, old libertarian joke I'll recycle -

How many Ron Paul supporters does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The free market will take care of it.

JM

 

[Carson]

I thought this one was pretty good.

I'm not really sure it is Ron Paul though. I think I heard someone mention it was someone that just looked like him in the picture...

still I want to believe.