Advice on being anti-social

LibertiORDeth

LibertiORDeth

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Joined
Dec 6, 2007
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2,992
So lately I've been feeling very anti-social, and it's been affecting my school and social life. I have lately been really disliking people, just wanted to hide in my bedroom at my computer all day and not wanting to be around anyone for the most part. Not sure why but it's been stressing me out a bit, particularly combined with the stress I already have over worrying about college and my career, so I'm trying to figure out if this is going to last or if its just a short phase I'm going through.
 
"hating people" really means hating yourself. find out what's bothering you about you. i'm finally coming out of my decade long people hating era.
 
What has ye 'disliking people'? Like.....what they talk about? or...you're having trouble talking to people?


:O
 
ForLiberty-RonPaul said:
"hating people" really means hating yourself. find out what's bothering you about you. i'm finally coming out of my decade long people hating era.
Click to expand...

He didn't say he hated them, he said he disliked them. And really I'm getting the vibe/impression that he does not dislike people per say, he dislikes being around them. If he really hated people in general he would not be confused or frustrated regarding his unsociable behavior, it would make sense to him.

People are naturally social, and I doubt he is suffering any severe psychological disorder to exempt him from this. So to try and inch closer toward the actual problem, I would say he only dislikes being around certain types of people and not all of them. For some reason he has been disenchanted with the people around him (the only "people" he knows), not necessarily the abstraction "people" in general. It sounds like his "dislike of people" has been recently acquired, its not something that has always been for him. So I think its safe to say something might have caused this, rather then it just being all his fault.

But I realize this is speculation, unless the OP thinks I am on to something, he will have to elaborate.
 
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Andrew-Austin said:
He didn't say he hated them, he said he disliked them. And really I'm getting the vibe/impression that he does not dislike people per say, he dislikes being around them. If he really hated people in general he would not be confused or frustrated regarding his unsociable behavior, it would make sense to him.

People are naturally social, and I doubt he is suffering any severe psychological disorder to exempt him from this. So to try and inch closer toward the actual problem, I would say he only dislikes being around certain types of people and not all of them. For some reason he has been disenchanted with the people around him (the only "people" he knows), not necessarily the abstraction "people" in general. It sounds like his "dislike of people" has been recently acquired, its not something that has always been for him. So I think its safe to say something might have caused this, rather then it just being all his fault.

But I realize this is speculation, unless the OP thinks I am on to something, he will have to elaborate.
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wasn't implying all that. but a general dislike of all people only have one thing in common. the disliker.
 
ForLiberty-RonPaul said:
wasn't implying all that. but a general dislike of all people only have one thing in common. the disliker.
Click to expand...

I know you didn't imply any of that, most of it was my speculation, the subject interests me. But saying that the source of his problem is his own self-hate, is saying that its all his fault...

I myself am not very social at all, but I don't hate or even dislike people. My reluctance to socialize seems more out of habit to me these days, and I have my various theories as to how it might stem from problems growing up. What social interaction I do have, I get along just fine. And I definitely don't hate myself, maybe there is something wrong with me but it isn't self-hate. Unsociable behavior can be caused by more things then self-contempt. And really I think self hate would cause bitterness and hostility rather than apathy.

And as I was saying one can't really hate "all people", unless one is suffering some kind of severe psychological problem. "All people" is an abstraction, you can't meet or be around all of "humanity". That plus the fact that this sounds like something that has only afflicted him recently, makes me think we can look for the source of the problem in something that happened to him regarding his relationships/interactions. He didn't just start hating himself.
 
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I'm hoping you aren't referring to this type of anti-social behavior (if you are then you would be well suited for a life in politics)

I have always been very introverted. Since I was a child I generally found other people to be, well, stupid and obnoxious. Over time I realized that with my personality, I don't need constant interaction and acceptance of others to be happy. From the end of high school on and I came to learn that spending time reading and with my hobbies is more fulfilling than hanging out with others. Don't get me wrong I still do have a close knit group of friends, but I don't dedicate my time/mental stability to having others accept me into their group (like so many others do).

Be yourself, find what you want to accomplish in life, and damn all those that stand in your way
 
I'm still trying to pin down exactly what it is. I've always disliked people in that I find most people to be inferior in my opinion, however I still have liked being around and talking to people, and it might have to do as Andrew-Austin said with the people I'm around, but lately I've just had the urge to not go to class as I want to be alone, and to not be around people in general.
 
LibertiORDeth said:
I'm still trying to pin down exactly what it is. I've always disliked people in that I find most people to be inferior in my opinion, however I still have liked being around and talking to people, and it might have to do as Andrew-Austin said with the people I'm around, but lately I've just had the urge to not go to class as I want to be alone, and to not be around people in general.
Click to expand...

Are you still in high school or are you talking about college? If you are in college would you say this might stem back to high school? I ask because there is a pretty big difference between the two, or at least there seems to be to me. For starters, people more or less go to college voluntarily, you and everyone else had no choice but to attend public school, and well some very perturbed social conditions fester in most of them.
 
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Andrew-Austin said:
Are you still in high school or are you talking about college? If you are in college would you say this might stem back to high school? I ask because there is a pretty big difference between the two, or at least there seems to be to me. For starters, people more or less go to college voluntarily, you and everyone else had no choice but to attend public school, and well some very perturbed social conditions fester in most of them.
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This is college, I'm an upper-class man, I never went to high school.
 
Andrew-Austin said:
I know you didn't imply any of that, most of it was my speculation, the subject interests me. But saying that the source of his problem is his own self-hate, is saying that its all his fault...

I myself am not very social at all, but I don't hate or even dislike people. My reluctance to socialize seems more out of habit to me these days, and I have my various theories as to how it might stem from problems growing up. What social interaction I do have, I get along just fine. And I definitely don't hate myself, maybe there is something wrong with me but it isn't self-hate. Unsociable behavior can be caused by more things then self-contempt. And really I think self hate would cause bitterness and hostility rather than apathy.

And as I was saying one can't really hate "all people", unless one is suffering some kind of severe psychological problem. "All people" is an abstraction, you can't meet or be around all of "humanity". That plus the fact that this sounds like something that has only afflicted him recently, makes me think we can look for the source of the problem in something that happened to him regarding his relationships/interactions. He didn't just start hating himself.
Click to expand...


well we actually agree. The misunderstanding is that you think I was assigning "fault", which is goofy idea in and of itself. "Fault" doesn't matter. He feels what he feels. And I agree that people don't just start hating themselves. It happens very gradually and very much "under the radar". It comes on very much like the way our country has been taken over. By the time you see it, it's already in place and fortified.
 
brandonyates said:
What do you mean you never went to highschool?

Not judging you, I'm a highschool drop out myself. Just curious about your situation.
Click to expand...

he applied to college when he was 14

doogie_howser_showcard.jpg
 
Unsocial person: Someone who dislikes being around people, who is something of a loner, etc.
Antisocial person: Someone who sets fires at gas stations.
FYI ;)
 
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