I can understand why you are questioning your beliefs.
I am a Christian, but before that I was a pagan. Still today even though I consider myself a Christian I still hold a lot of my pagan philosophies dear to me (ie, respect animals, animals have a soul, respect nature). Tthe only thing that has changed since then is I believe in Jesus. However, I am not a Christian in a broad sense and I am shunned by a lot.
I don't take the Bible literally, and I never have. I curse (a lot) and I honestly feel if God is going to strike me down for saying 'fuck' while he lets rapists and murderers in heaven, then well, I would rather go to Hell. I'm a Christian that first and foremost follows the
Beatitudes. This means if I see a Salvation Army donation basket and I have the choice to put 5 bucks in there or go buy a necklace, I will donate. I try not to buy anything that is beyond what I absolutely need. I try not to waste anything, and I try to help everybody.
Tthe problem with Christians is that a lot do not act the part of the Good Samaritan. There's nothing wrong with humans acting humanely to each other and helping each other. But no, Christians today don't practice what comes out of their own mouths. They'll preach that cheating and being adulterous is wrong, and you'll catch them doing it. They'll preach to you to give money to the poor and they walk past the homeless all the time turning their cheek against them.
I'm a Christian that feels everyone can get into heaven, and not just Christians. It's sad for me to say many of the Christians I have met I feel won't go to heaven. I see more athiests, agnostics, pagans, etc. acting more 'Christianly.' I know a lot of my friends are better than me in so many ways and they do not believe in God, but I doubt that will stop God from letting a
good human being have eternal life. That's my belief.
All the people in your life Luke pushed you away from the true teachings of Christianity (IMHO), as so many Christians today are. Your parents are controlling, as well as your sibling(s), and like I have said to you in the chatroom that leads to many many harsh feelings and views. I hope your searching for a religion or not having a religion works for you and you find one and it fits you well, no matter what it may or may not be. It wasn't the Church that brought me to Christianity, not priests, not friends, not family, not any of these
by far - I did. Through work, volunteering, and experiencing the world I knew where I fit in. Maybe you do fit in with the nihilists, maybe you fit in with the Christians, maybe you one day will be a pagan. No parent or sibling can give you a true understanding of something - only you can.
Good luck.

Hope I sorta made sense.